Cleansing Fire

Defending Truth and Tradition in the Roman Catholic Church

Weak in the knees?

December 4th, 2010, Promulgated by Ink

Does your back start to hurt when the communion line is too long and you are kneeling for fifteen to twenty minutes at a time, or longer?

Don’t let your uptightness get in the way!  Try the new and improved Three-Point-Kneel!

It takes the stress off your back but, at the same time, you’re still kneeling and being reverent! As an added bonus, the level of your head does not change significantly so nobody except the people sitting next to you notices!

If you’re tired but you feel exceptionally trendy, try the snazzy Eastern Style!  A traditional Japanese sitting style for millennia, it has been imported into the United States for ease of post-communion sitting.

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8 Responses to “Weak in the knees?”

  1. Dr. K says:

    Educational! 🙂

  2. Monk says:

    The next time my wife complains about my posture in Church, I can now tell her that I am doing the “official Ink three point kneel!”
    Thanks!

  3. Sister Emily says:

    Hey I’m not laughing! Wait till YOU turn 50 and have plastic knees. You will welcome advise like this. I will give option 1 a shot on Sunday. Thanks Ink.

  4. Bernie says:

    My option #1 days are long gone for any extended period of time (longer than 10 secs.)
    I can barely get back up from option #2 so option #3 is definitely out.

  5. Matt says:

    As it is my birthday, and I’m old now…

    I appreciate such advice!

  6. Mike says:

    I adopted the Three-Point-Kneel a long time ago, for reasons similar to those of Bernie and Sr. Emily.

    Any any nun I knew in my pre-Vatican II days would have called this posture “slouching” – usually in a very public and, hence, embarrassing way! – but nowadays very few of those dear ladies are still around to prick at my conscience.

  7. Ink's Mum says:

    Is that me in illustration #1? 😉

  8. Ink says:

    XD Maybe, Mum. Maybe. =P

    @all: I really just meant to make everyone smile. Nobody said that penitential times meant you had to be sad!

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