Cleansing Fire

Defending Truth and Tradition in the Roman Catholic Church

I’ve Got a Confession

February 19th, 2010, Promulgated by Gen

I’m the Pope.

I think we all know about Pope Michael – he’s been a subject from time to time here. If you’re not familiar, he’s a farmer from Kansas who had his parents and friends elect him pope in a “conclave” in 1990. So, yes – he believes he’s the true, valid, sole, and God-appointed Pope. In his words, Pope Paul VI was the anti-Christ, John XXIII was posessed by the devil, John Paul II and Benedict XVI are anti-popes and heretics, and he alone is the head of the Church. Yes, a Kansas farmer who has his vestments made by his mother is the Pope. Let’s all take a trip to Topeka and kiss his ring.

Well, seeing as how he’s launched a new website, I decided to break the news that I, too, was elected pope in a conclave. I was elected on June 14th, 1989, by my parents’ condo board. (Folks – it’s not real. It’s a joke. Do not say I’m a sedevacantist or an apostate. I’m kidding around with this video. It’s done in jest.)

So, in response to his lunatic ravings, I have posted my very own video explaining my election to the throne of Peter.

Oh – the fake pope, Pope Michael, gave my video one star. Please, please, please rate my video five stars!




5 Responses to “I’ve Got a Confession”

  1. Reminds me of the election of Pope Pius XIII (Lucian Pulvermacher) in October of 1998 (+ Nov, 2009). He was "elected" by a retinue of hand-picked "cardinals". Shortly before he died he was still "Gloriously reigning" from some mailbox in Kalispell, Montana. +RIP

  2. Louis E. says:

    Oh,I didn't know Pulvermacher had died!…have his "cardinals" chosen a Pius XIV or were none left?

    Note however that he was NOT elected by "cardinals",he fell back on the theory of election by popular acclamation in the absence of any valid cardinals (being in communion with that fellow in the Vatican being proof of heresy in his book).He had faithful in several places around the world phone in votes to a trailer where he'd rigged white smoke.It is not recorded that any of his voters (nor any of Pope Michael's) had any affiliation with the Diocese of Rome,which of course they would have to have to vote in the absence of real Cardinals…it is the head of the particular church of Rome who is therefore head of the Universal Church,not vice versa.

    After he was chosen he named some Cardinals,declaring one of them (Gordon Bateman,who later renounced all connection) a bishop so that he could ordain Pulvermacher a bishop (apostolic succession being for heretics,I suppose),and another a priest (Robert Lyons,his secretary,who stopped maintaining which might mean a falling out?).

  3. Louis E. says:

    Oh,I didn't mention that "Robert Cardinal Lyons" is married.

  4. Yapollo says:

    Brillant thinking, Gen. I am going to ask to be a bishop. You have Dr. K and In the Choir Loft try to be cardinals too. We should all apply for positions…….

    Oh wait, I am too busy, nevermind.

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