This was written by a friend of mine. I hope you enjoy it.
I’ll have to do what when I come in? Be quiet? Be quiet for what?! What do you mean people will be praying? Can’t they do that at home before they leave the house? Sheesh.
Of course I have a rosary. Didn’t you see it hanging from my rearview mirror? That’s not what it’s for? I’m supposed to pray with it? Before Mass? To get what? An Indulgence? What’s an Indulgence?
I don’t hear the piano. Where’s the piano player? There’s always a piano player warming up. Somebody shot the piano player!
Hey, what are all those people doing standing in line over there? “Confession”? Oh, you mean Reconciliation. How come they’re doing that now? It ain’t Easter ya know. Duh.
I can’t wait for the before, during and after public service announcements, you know why? Becau… What?? You don’t have those either?? But I wanted them to announce my birthday! How will the people know it is my birthday?!?
What do you mean no homily? You mean I have to sit through a sermon? But what if he says something…..you knowww…unpleasant?! Well,… if his jokes are good I guess it’ll be okay.
Don’t shout out my responses? Pray from the heart?? Enter the “Sacred Mystery”?? “Christ present on the Altar”?? Well, that’s just great.
You don’t have liturgical dancers? Saaaaaaaayyyyy….what kind of Church is this anyway??
What about the Sign of Peace? We still get to do that, right? I mean I got my eye on a real cutie and I can’t wait to…what’s that you say? No Sign of Peace? You mean I don’t get to do no huggin’ and kissin’? Dang. There goes my chance for happiness.
I don’t even get to sing???!!? First no piano player and now this. I mean…whatdya expect me to do for an hour??
Tags: Latin Mass, Liturgy
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BWAAHAHHAHhahhaahaaaaaaaa!
I love it.
"What about the Sign of Peace?"
OLV has finally decided to do away with this. Thank God! The interchange of peace between the priest and congregation is more than enough. Anything more just disrupts the flow of the liturgy.
~Dr. K
Thank God? Are you kidding? Heaven forbid we actually teach people the meaning of what they should be doing rather than just removing it from the Mass.
~TD
I agree, I'm glad that it's gone. Sorry TD but hand-shaking doesn't belong in the sacrifice of the Mass. I sure hope people weren't shaking hands when our Lord was crucified.
That's a false analogy. Neither St. John nor Our Lady was singing in Latin at the foot of the cross, either, but I don't think we should eliminate chant. If we actually fulfilled the words of Christ as this time, it would not be disruptive at all, but rather the beautiful time of reconciliation intended.
"So if you are offering your gift at the altar, and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there before the altar and go; first be reconciled to your brother, and then come and offer your gift."
Why, then, should we bring ourselves under the blood of the perfect sacrifice without the same reconciliation amoung brethern? We are about to be united one to another in the most profound of ways. Let us do so in a way that doesn't dishonor Christ.
~TD
Funny how dissing those who attend the TLM is hurtful, but dissing those who attend the Novus Ordo is somehow acceptable.
Put it down as reason 938 why I don't attend the TLM. And consider the orthodox parishes not much better than the dissident ones.
TD- You're not enraging in reconciliation with your brother, you're shaking the hands of people around you. I think you're confusing the Kiss of Peace with the Confiteor.
"Let us do so in a way that doesn't dishonor Christ." I agree. We can start by not interfering with that very profound personal moment of our brethren in the pews as they are about to receive their God.
Good riddance
Perhaps more accurate to say I'm annoyed with the portrayal of all Novus Ordo Masses as if they're all in the worst possible way.
Why to act all pained when someone doesn't cherish the TLM, yet you treat the name Novus Ordo as if it was trash?
Thou sayest it.
Anon7:50,
Whoa, you are WAY off.
Then again, your response is why I attend the OF and don't (usually) go to the TLM. The TLM is not my first choice, but you don't see me bad-mouthing it.
By making a display of why you do not attend the TLM you are in a way bad-mouthing it.
Besides, at least I have the guts to sign my own name.
Dear Anon too chicken to sign his or her own name,
Don't even go there.
Are you so missing in the ability to be self-critical that you can't even imagine overstepping a line?
Saying to someone that they've overstepped a line is not anywhere near the equivalent of the generic trashing of the Novus Ordo that I so frequently read.
As for your hasty and inaccurate assumptions, I know very well what the TLM is about. I grew up with the TLM. You do not want to go there.
So perhaps you should pray for some humility yourself.
You're right. Who nees the Mass of the Ages? I mean why would anyone want to have their offering joined to the merits of the Blessed Virgin Mary, Saint Peter and Saint Paul when they can join it to each other's? We're holy, right? I mean we just did the Sign of Peace.
Who would anyone want to pray along with the VERY SAME WORDS OF PRAYER as Canonized priests and popes when they can pray the vulgar Prayers of the People?
So what if they have the beautiful High Altar that reaches towards Heaven and gives glory to God? We have a really cool Cramner Table. On wheels.
So what if the TLM has sacred hymns? We have tunes.
Who cares if their hymns were written by the angels? Ours were written by Marty Haugen and David Haas, two Protestant composers and proponents of Homosexuality. Who needs "Holy God, We Praise They Name" when we can have "On Eagle's Wings"?
No, no. We don't need the Gregorian Rite? The Church had it all wrong but we fixed it now.
First, I apologize for touching off a flame war. Not my intention, and perhaps I was too harsh in tone. But I don't think that excuses the attitude displayed of "We're right; you're wrong; you're not a Catholic."
The Confiteor is an acknowledgement of one's own sin and prayers for one's soul. The sign of peace is an acknowledgement of reconciliation and that those assembled are at peace.
~TD
I agree. You were out of line.
But peace be with you.
Another thing I take great comfort in with the Traditional Mass is that I can say with 100% certainty that I am not kneeling next to someone who voted for obama. You can't.
I grow tired of all this vain defense of the indefensible. Thanks for letting me stop by. It's been uh…different.
TD, thanks.
Anonymous, one of the difficulties with "Anonymous" is not knowing if it's the same person or someone else chiming in.
Some day if and when you and I meet in person, perhaps we can discuss it then, but this is obviously not the best format for this discussion.
Funny post, Choir!
CHOIR, What happend here?
A sense of humor goes a long way.
But in all seriousness, the TLM is better.
So portraying all those who attend the Novus Ordo, not just the liturgical abuse, but ALL those who attend the Novus Ordo as clueless, "without spirituality," as not "authentic" Catholics – that's supposed to be funny?
It's a good thing my reasons for attending Mass have nothing to do with people because I don't want to be part of a church where the church people ridicule and make fun of others.
Oh, and anon11:02, But in all seriousness, the TLM is better … in all seriousness, you're in disagreement with the Church who doesn't get into one-up-man-ship about "better" and says the Novus Ordo is the Ordinary Form of the Mass.
Time for me to start skipping the Rochester blogs.
The Novus Ordo would be (is) beautiful when it's done correctly, licitly, according to the GIRM. The problem isn't the NO itself – it's the way it's been messed with here in the DOR. Liberties get taken and the end result is something that is no longer recognizable.
Fr. Firpo's homily this evening had a great theme that we should all take to heart: Our allegiance should be to G*D and Him alone… We should all be on the same team here.
(And for what it's worth, we're going to try to make the TLM tomorrow as well… Since a third of our family will be fulfilling a previous engagement tomorrow, we took them to Mass tonight.)
Fr. Firpo? I remember him 100 years ago when I was a kid in the southern tier. Where is he now? Any way I thought I'd chime in on this discussion. I attend TLM here in Roch, and I have never missed the sign of peace. I grew up with the NO. Last night I attended OLOV and when Fr. A skipped over it, I laughed out loud. I thought it was great. It has been a huge distraction (not at OLOV) but if you go other places, the people are all out of the pews all over the place, even the priest! And where is our Lord? He is left alone on the altar. So I don't miss it at TLM.
Hey Gretchen, I hope you enjoy Mass today. I can't come b/c I have to work, but I will be there spiritually.
Choir, your posts really gets folks worked up. Please post what the homily is about today 🙂 I'd love to know what I'm missing. I sure wish we could film it and post it.
Mary Kay – no one ever said ALL N.O. Masses are bad, or that ALL people who go to them are.
Also, the Church has stated, in a way, that one is more reverent than the other. One is "Ordinary" and one is "Extraordinary." In my humble opinion, heaven would be more inclined towards the extra-ordinary than to just "ordinary."
So you'd rather see more EHMC's at the Mass, rather than just the "ordinary" minister, the priest? Zing! 🙂
~TD
Gretchen, yes, exactly:
The Novus Ordo would be (is) beautiful when it's done correctly, licitly, according to the GIRM. The problem isn't the NO itself
My point was the worst case scenario portrayal of all Novus Ordo Masses and those attending/assisting. And yet there are people, such as Anon7:50 who habitually disparage the Novus Ordo. My reaction was annoyance at the constant disparagement and "worst case scenario" portrayal of the Novus Ordo.
TD, again thanks. It's funny how Ordinary/Extraordinary takes on different meanings depending on whether applied to Mass or EMHC.
Gen no one ever said ALL N.O. Masses are bad, or that ALL people who go to them are
There is nothing in that piece that makes that distinction. In addition, the overall tone of characterizing "a Novus Ordoite" as a buffoon is uncharitable and counterproductive.
There are some who knowingly and willingly flaunt Church teaching and while I wouldn't respond the same way, my guess is they are your main target.
But this entry is aimed at, treats as buffoons, the people in the pew. People who mostly have not received proper catechesis. And yes, as written, it's generalizable to all Novus Ordo Masses – there's no distinction made to say otherwise.
I'm sure most here would have no problem with a N.O. Mass at OLV, so the problem really isn't the N.O. vs. the TLM so much as it is the average Rochester N.O. vs. the TLM. There are plenty of liturgical abuse ridden N.O. Masses in Rochester, and several areas, which contribute to giving the N.O. a bad reputation.
A reverently offered N.O., possibly with Latin, chant, and celebrated ad orientem, would seem very familiar to the regular TLM goer.
~Dr. K
Scott/Mary,
Fr. Firpo is at St. Charles Borromeo. I still haven't made a Mass at OLOV. I'm looking forward to it sometime.
Just a point on the meaning of extraordinary. It does not mean rare, it does not mean better, in these contexts. It simply means not the ordinary…different than the norm.
Well said.
And I think we all know what is truly "ordinary" in these times.
Why don't all you ridiculous whiners, carpers, and detractors grow up. You are all such a bunch of good Catholics, and not a Christian among you.
SHUT UP! 7:03