Cleansing Fire

Defending Truth and Tradition in the Roman Catholic Church

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A little Catholic humor again :)

October 23rd, 2009, Promulgated by Choir

I’m trying to work on my next installment about Bishop Sheen, but I’ve been reading some Catholic jokes I thought I would pass along. I’ll get back to working on Sheen asap.

Lost on a rainy Friday night, a priest stumbles into a monastery and requests shelter there. Fortunately, he’s just in time for dinner and was treated to the best fish and chips he’s ever had.

After dinner, he goes into the kitchen to thank the chefs. He is met by two brothers, “Hello, I’m Brother Michael, and this is Brother Francis.”

“I’m very pleased to meet you. I just wanted to thank you for a wonderful dinner. The fish and chips were the best I’ve ever tasted. Out of curiosity, who cooked what?”

Brother Charles replied, “Well, I’m the fish friar.”

Father turns to the other brother and says, “Then you must be….”

“Yes, I’m afraid I’m the chip monk…”

————–
A little boy was listening to a long and excessively boring sermon in church. Suddenly his eye caught the red sanctuary lamp. Tugging his father’s sleeve, he said, “Daddy, when the light turns green can we go?”
————–
The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples. The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray: “Take only ONE. God is watching.”

Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies. A child had written a note, “Take all you want. God is watching the apples.
—————–


A man walks into a monastery and says ?I want to be monk.?
The abbot replies ?Great! But you realize we are not allowed to talk except every ten years.?
The man replies ?Fine.?
Ten years go by and the man goes into the abbot?s office. The abbot asks, ?Well my son what have you to say.
The man replies ?Bed?s hard.?
The abbot remarks, ?Is that it??
The man says, ?Yes?.
Another ten years go by and the man goes into the abbot?s office and says, ?Food stinks!?
The abbot asks, ?Is that it??
And the man says ?Yes.?
Another ten years goes by and the man goes into the abbot?s office and says ?Water?s cold. I quit!?
And the abbot replies, ?Figures! You?ve been complaining ever since you got here!”
———————-

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3 Responses to “A little Catholic humor again :)”

  1. avatar Yapollo says:

    That last joke is one of the classics, this was the third time this month I've read it.

    Still never gets old.

  2. avatar Gen says:

    lol @ "chip monk"

  3. avatar Sister Emily says:

    Hey Choir, what do they call a priest in Germany?

    A german Shepard of course.

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